No religion can last for long without some sort of Jihad to hold the peoples'
attention, and Discordianism is no different.
However, as a whole, we find car bombs, bodily
dismemberment and torture to be in very poor taste, so our options are
rather limited. Also, we try to do what we can to keep some kind of logical
consistency between our actions and our morals (I'll wait while you get that
out of your system. Okay? C'mon, breathe. Think sad thoughts or
something. Okay? Okay). In short, we wouldn't feel right if we (taking a
completely hypothetical example, mind you; just something off the top of
my head), say, preached peace, love and forgiveness and then went about burning
people at the stake as heretics. I mean, what would the neighbors think?
We believe that confusion and insanit ...er... ``unbridled joy''
are good things, so our particular brand of warfare centers around
delivering those things to the stuck-up clamped anii that so desperately
need them (members of
The Orders of Discordia,
The two most popular and successful forms of Erisian Warfare are
(which is not to be confused with
[and neither of them will even be seen in the same room with the
Flustered Militant Dadaists of the New Pomegranate,
to be sure]) and
In addition to personal assaults, we often combat the establishment as a
fnording dollar bills.
Included herein for your protection during your Holey Work is the most
jealously guarded of all Erisian Mystical Ceremonies -- the
We're presently embroiled in a legal battle, which is detailed in a report
The CSEA Affair.
Be careful not to confuse actual Enemas of the People with the poor, hapless
You should also be on the lookout for people who are not under the influence of
either THEM or the Horrid Shub, and do what you can to